Since I created this blog as an alternative to journal I am going to do just that. Journal. I have had a very long week and it is just Tuesday, so instead of a hand cramp, I am typing to you. I know you said to make our alms in secret, but seeing my one follower is my best friend, I feel I can be candid.
Dear Lord,
I am worn out. I have felt that with Jeff gone, the house not selling, the dishes, the laundry, and the kids whining and rebellion that I am done. Put a fork in it. I want to walk away, throw in the towel, give up and move on. I sat and cried out to you the other day with tears streaming down my face. I have walked this faith walk claiming our house sold for almost two years now. What am I missing?!! Lord, I felt that every worldly thought man has given me was advice I should have taken. I felt that I have missed my blessing being too focused on you performing some miracle. Isn't that the God you are?! A super natural, miracle performing God? The enemy has found a home in my head this past week and he set up camp as I rolled round in the misery he brings: the kids rebellion, whining, house not selling, and every other ill thought. It has set me on "crazy mode" and it won't turn off. Then, in the mist of this storm- add a day of vomiting (food poisoning, I suppose) to that already overwhelming feeling of I am drowning. It. keeps. getting. worse.
But then.... Lord, you show up. Even though I have hit crazy mode and convinced myself I have failed at motherhood and felt my faith walk was in vain (I mean obviously I am doing something wrong or my prayer would be answered by know, right?) you give me grace. You give me a Word in due season. I was on empty and You filled me up. I was drowning and You gave me a life preserver. I am reminded that every strong hold- is in my mind. I am reminded that you do perform miracles because you paid our son's tuition this year! Lord, you said that "so a man thinketh, is he." I have allowed the enemy to convince me that I was a bad mother. I have allowed my vision of selling our house to become nothing but a "has been hope." What was I thinking?! I seriously wonder if you ever go "when will she get it? She is having to start all over again." Lord, I am praying for you to forgive me for my unbelief. Praying you would seek my heart and forgive me of what I know is not there that may be blocking my blessing. I pray that you break down every strong hold that governs my mind and thank you that you DO want to prosper us. Lord, forgive me for not putting you on a platform you can perform on and thank you for the renewal of my faith. Lord, you said that "faith is the substance of thing hoped for and evidence of things unseen." Now all I have to say to that old serpent, is get thee behind me, Satan!! I am a good mom- I am the daughter of the King of Kings. I am royal priesthood and I have been given the abundant life and our house is SOLD! Yes, I fail, and yes I may fall, but I will get back up and ride this faith walk out until I get what I have asked. Time. And time again. Your Word says to "knock and the door will open." I have been knocking and now I expect (to hope) the door to open. I hope (to expect) to hear from you. I expect great and exceeding abundant and I pray that you would give me your heart, Lord, so that I may walk in your ways with purpose. I love you and thank you that your mercies are new EVERY DAY! Thank you that I am made new in you today, Lord. I love you and thank you for your living Word. Kingdom come!!!! Amen!
Tuesday, July 30, 2013
Monday, July 8, 2013
Independence Day 2013- Creole style
This was the second time, since being married, we weren't able to spend the forth of July with Jeff. He was recently relocated to a job that is ten hours away some where in Texas. =( The kids and I embarked on my first ever "road trip" or at least half way we were alone. I had the privilege of taking my uncle Russ to the "Big Easy" aka "NOLA" and we stayed with our dear friends a few days before we came back home.
Here is a little snap shot of my patriotic duo before we left on our trip!
Uncle Russ and I always have fun on our trips. There is good conversation and good laughs. The last trip we took together, we made plenty of funny memories as we whipped our heads and "caught" the person driving next to us looking at us. This time- we had Ruth. Baby Ruth. Layla's beloved "baby." She looks so real when we take her places that people actually think I am irresponsibly lugging a child around. So I held her as I drove and Uncle Russ bounced her on his knee." It's OK Ruth. We got cha!" Yes, we looked like the worse parents ever. And No. It wasn't responsible. But hey, life is short. Laugh a little. =)
We got to New Orleans with little time to enjoy the quarter. So Uncle Russ, the kids, and I took a quick stroll through down town and then he caught the Mega Bus home. Pretty cool ride back home to Mobile for $17.00, I say! I sure hate to see him go. He is SO much fun and it was nice to have family here for a while. Much love to ya, Uncle!
Dwayne and Annette treated me to Drago's Seafood while their girls kept the kids (I only had to bribe Layla with candy). And let me just say- the charbroiled oysters were a buttery, charbroiled delight! Can we say YUM!!?!!
We also made a trip to uptown NOLA and got to visit with (Jeff's) Aunt Carol. She is so much fun and such a pleasure to be around. I am blessed to know her and get to be a part of her life. The kids adore her as well. Gavin caught lizards (imagine that) at her house. Then, we had a quick, sit down lunch at her house and then made a trip to Sucre' with Melissa and Charles. A little scoop of heaven in a small, flower shaped bowl! I will have to say that while the ice cream and melted Smores cake was a delight, one of my favorite things was people watching and the culture. Everything in NOLA is unique. From the shops, to the people, to the sidewalks, to the bus benches, to the trolley, to the electrical poles. Yes, electrical poles. Check this out.
I didn't get a chance to snap a picture of Layla stuffing beads up her shorts at Sucre. But hey, we were in the "Big Easy" after all.
We ended our trip with a crawfish boil! Such a Cajun way to say good bye. Gavin even ate a few handfuls of them. He peeled them and everything! * Proud moment * Dwayne and Annette are so good great to us. I feel like I am living like a Cajun queen while I am there.
I could go on and on about how much fun we had. Such as how much joy I had in watching Gavin catch all the tree frogs suctioned to the Burke house. Or how he spent his days scooping out whatever he could catch in a net from the canal. Or the kids playing at the neighborhood park... and visiting with extended family (bc the good Lord allowed us to cross paths), or walking up and down Magazine Street with family, and snapping pictures of Café Du Monde coffee and Mardi Gras masks in a souvenir shop with a great Uncle, or enjoying family (where nothing has to be said to laugh). God has blessed me with the best friends and family- both near and far- and my life is so rich because of it!
Here is a little snap shot of my patriotic duo before we left on our trip!
Uncle Russ and I always have fun on our trips. There is good conversation and good laughs. The last trip we took together, we made plenty of funny memories as we whipped our heads and "caught" the person driving next to us looking at us. This time- we had Ruth. Baby Ruth. Layla's beloved "baby." She looks so real when we take her places that people actually think I am irresponsibly lugging a child around. So I held her as I drove and Uncle Russ bounced her on his knee." It's OK Ruth. We got cha!" Yes, we looked like the worse parents ever. And No. It wasn't responsible. But hey, life is short. Laugh a little. =)
(Hey, don't judge)
We got to New Orleans with little time to enjoy the quarter. So Uncle Russ, the kids, and I took a quick stroll through down town and then he caught the Mega Bus home. Pretty cool ride back home to Mobile for $17.00, I say! I sure hate to see him go. He is SO much fun and it was nice to have family here for a while. Much love to ya, Uncle!
(Can you see Uncle Russ riding shot gun, top level?!)
Dwayne and Annette treated me to Drago's Seafood while their girls kept the kids (I only had to bribe Layla with candy). And let me just say- the charbroiled oysters were a buttery, charbroiled delight! Can we say YUM!!?!!
(LOVE this couple)
We also made a trip to uptown NOLA and got to visit with (Jeff's) Aunt Carol. She is so much fun and such a pleasure to be around. I am blessed to know her and get to be a part of her life. The kids adore her as well. Gavin caught lizards (imagine that) at her house. Then, we had a quick, sit down lunch at her house and then made a trip to Sucre' with Melissa and Charles. A little scoop of heaven in a small, flower shaped bowl! I will have to say that while the ice cream and melted Smores cake was a delight, one of my favorite things was people watching and the culture. Everything in NOLA is unique. From the shops, to the people, to the sidewalks, to the bus benches, to the trolley, to the electrical poles. Yes, electrical poles. Check this out.
(In case you can't tell what this is- that is LAYERS of old signs, staples, and nails)
("You are in Saints Country" says the sign behind me
and Gavin- well, enough said)
("Red Beans, Pinball Machines, Chicory Coffee, and Hoodoo Queens.
File Gumbo and Pralines. Everything's Hot Down in New Orleans")
(Even the stop signs have character!)
I didn't get a chance to snap a picture of Layla stuffing beads up her shorts at Sucre. But hey, we were in the "Big Easy" after all.
We ended our trip with a crawfish boil! Such a Cajun way to say good bye. Gavin even ate a few handfuls of them. He peeled them and everything! * Proud moment * Dwayne and Annette are so
(Davin and Gavin- best buds-grubbing down. And Pie in the middle)
I could go on and on about how much fun we had. Such as how much joy I had in watching Gavin catch all the tree frogs suctioned to the Burke house. Or how he spent his days scooping out whatever he could catch in a net from the canal. Or the kids playing at the neighborhood park... and visiting with extended family (bc the good Lord allowed us to cross paths), or walking up and down Magazine Street with family, and snapping pictures of Café Du Monde coffee and Mardi Gras masks in a souvenir shop with a great Uncle, or enjoying family (where nothing has to be said to laugh). God has blessed me with the best friends and family- both near and far- and my life is so rich because of it!
We missed you, Jeff! Love you!
Bye-Bye Diaper Days!
I have not kept a journal...a blog...a notepad..or index cards of Layla's milestones. I find my self being too with Jeff working 14-18 hours days to remember to sit down and right a few things down. Things I think I will never forget have somehow hit the delete button in my brain. So! Here I am- to officially type it in text that: our little lady is fully potty trained!!! Last night marked night four of her sleeping in panties. I am super, over enthusiastic about this! She insisted on wearing panties to bed a few nights back and we haven't looked back since. I promised myself that with kid #2- I was NOT using Pull Ups. And where I would like to take credit for some of this- she was just an easy one to potty train. So, for you Miss Layla: Once you got it- you GOT it! You are two years and 7 months old.
This comes with me feeling a little sad for her big brother. At a little over a month away from him being seven- he is still wearing Pull-Ups to bed (with no dry nights). After a few medications, a trip to the pediatrician, and another trip to the urologist- they tell me we will revisit it when he is 8. I am praying God will allow his bladder and developmental skills to function as He designed them. I am also feeling that surgery may be needed. I believe he doesn't empty properly because of the frequent urination. And I am sure his "ADHD" (which I don't claim either) plays a big role in it. I will say this: the more I have opened up to talking to other moms about it- the more I hear how common it is. And recently I had a conversation with a lady who had a ten year old who still wet the bed. What it doesn't help with is Gavin's embarrassment to wear the Pull-Ups to bed. He tells me a lot of nights "I don't want to wear a Pull-Up, I know God will bless me." I know God hears his perfect, little prayers. We will pray this thing through!
I know I speak for both Jeff and I when I say, "I am so proud of our children." They hold the future and I can't wait to experience all the milestones of life with them!
This comes with me feeling a little sad for her big brother. At a little over a month away from him being seven- he is still wearing Pull-Ups to bed (with no dry nights). After a few medications, a trip to the pediatrician, and another trip to the urologist- they tell me we will revisit it when he is 8. I am praying God will allow his bladder and developmental skills to function as He designed them. I am also feeling that surgery may be needed. I believe he doesn't empty properly because of the frequent urination. And I am sure his "ADHD" (which I don't claim either) plays a big role in it. I will say this: the more I have opened up to talking to other moms about it- the more I hear how common it is. And recently I had a conversation with a lady who had a ten year old who still wet the bed. What it doesn't help with is Gavin's embarrassment to wear the Pull-Ups to bed. He tells me a lot of nights "I don't want to wear a Pull-Up, I know God will bless me." I know God hears his perfect, little prayers. We will pray this thing through!
I know I speak for both Jeff and I when I say, "I am so proud of our children." They hold the future and I can't wait to experience all the milestones of life with them!
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