What a beautiful day! A perfect Saturday. It's not too hot and my kids are in good humor, yet I can't shake this feeling of blah. I sit and think about all the families who are enjoying the weekend together and here I sit, alone, wishing my husband was home so we could enjoy the day together. I guess I'm feeling a bit sorry for myself and I should shake it off. But the truth is, it's more than just not wanting to be home alone. It's me really wanting to be home alone. A feeling we haven't had in months. I thank God every night that we have a roof over our head and plenty of room. And I am very grateful my mom and step dad have opened their home up to us (and they are easy going roommates), but I am longing to have a place of our own. Where our schedule doesn't interfere with anyone else's. I miss cleaning my own counter tops (yes, I actually miss cleaning my own kitchen). And I miss having a "space" for everything. Satan likes to put thoughts in my head that we may never sell our home, but I know he is just up to his old tricks trying to drag down my faith. And what does that mean? Well, call me crazy but I'm pretty lucky he is trying to do that. That means I'm living my life full of faith and he can't stand the thought of it! God's word is full of promises and 2 Cor. 1:20 says "for all the promises of God in him are yea, and in him Amen." So, I have faith in knowing what I ask for he has given to me. After all, his Word says "surely I have built thee a house to dwell in forever." Yes, this means our eternal home, but this is also so literal to me. God gave me that scripture (which is a whole new blog of it's own), so I know He has sent someone to buy our home. I just have to wait for them to come forth.
When I opened the computer to write this blog, I thought to myself "some days are diamonds and some days are stone" and I was just have a "stone" kind of day. But as I wrote about how faithful God is, I realized that my day is not going to be a stone kind of day. How could it be? This is the day the Lord has made, I will rejoice and be glad in it! Though every day is not going to be rainbows and butterflies (especially with me longing to be some where I am not) I have the choice to make the best of each day. Does this mean it doesn't matter that Jeff isn't here with us? NO! I still wish my husband is at home with us and I still long for our own home, but God has blessed us abundantly. He has given Jeff great job and we are living comfortably.
Normally when these days arise, I call a good friend, my MeMa, or find something fun to do. Today, I opened the computer and wrote. I think it's safe to say I will get much more out of this blog than I first realized!
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